Humans are Dog's Best Friends

Our little Chihuahua Feliz, died today. She was almost 15, which is roughly, 105 in "dog years." My heart's broken. It's been nearly 15 years since I slept without her snoring next to me. I'm having trouble sleeping.

I've been a dog person all my life and usually had bird-hunting dogs. Feliz was my first little dog. When Les began talking to Amie, (my husband to our daughter) about a Chihuahua as a possible birthday gift, my initial response was "I don't want a dog that looks like a rat!" (Sorry Fe.) Amie was around 12 at the time. Les reasoned that it would be good for her to have her own dog to care for and it could be company for her after school. (We already had 2 German Short Haired Pointers.) I agreed to being okay with them beginning a search.

They didn't exercise much restraint on their first excursion to "look at a litter," and upon their return, I was introduced to the cutest, littlest, most lovable little creature I'd ever laid eyes on! Amie and Les shared mutually in her purchase and thus, were able to claim her as their own. She, on the other hand, claimed me as her "person" immediately, and that's the relationship in which I've stayed for all these years.

In the Chihuahua version of Sir Edmond Hillary planting the first flag on the top of Mount Everest, on Feliz's first night as a member of our family, she carried out an amazing feat of acquisition. She snuggled into my bathrobe and kept snuggling until she emerged out of my left sleeve. Had she had opposable thumbs, she may well have planted a victory flag on my left hand.

There are hundreds and hundreds of wonderful memories. I'll share some of them later. (For the benefit of my porous memory, don't forget to share the epic fishing trip on the Green River just below Fontanelle Dam. Her first swim, fear of fish, an owl looking for lunch, an Osprey catching the first fish, a fox or coyote getting the Dutch Oven Pineapple Upside-down Cake and Feliz behaving as an actual dog.) (Remember to relate "Attack of the Tourist" in Jackson Hole, too.)

At any rate, Feliz hadn't been feeling well for a couple of weeks. Her breathing was labored and very difficult. She was very distressed last Wednesday night and didn't settle down to sleep at all. On Thursday night she kept Les from concentrating on late-night television with similar behavior. At around 1:00 a.m. I took her to the Veterinarian ER because she was so distressed. The Vet took x-rays of her heart, put her in an oxygen container and gave her a bunch of medications. We expected her to stay there for several days and then come home healthy.

The Vet on duty Friday afternoon did an ultrasound because her improvement was minimal. The ultrasound revealed she had cancer in her lungs and liver. Euthanasia was their suggestion, describing it as the humane choice. We weren't ready.

We brought her home Saturday night to keep her comfy and to get ready for her death. Les went to Wyoming, and I spent the day trying to pretend she was okay.

Amie and Zack came over in the afternoon to comfort her, and me. After Feliz listened to about an hour of tears and reminiscing, she laid her little head on Amie's shoulder and quit breathing. It happened so peacefully and now she's gone.

Feliz, Thank you for the enormous amount of sunshine you brought into my life. And in such a small bundle! Thank you for making me believe my arrival always made your day. You were the only creature on the planet that was happy to see me every time I came through the door. With you went a piece of my heart. Right now it feels like a giant hole, but I'm patching it up with happy memories of you. I love you, Your biggest fan, Mom

One side-bar: All dogs go to heaven. My Mom passed away over a year ago and she's in heaven doing whatever angels do. She loved Feliz, but never got her name right. She called her Phyllis. Amie, Zack and I laughed out loud talking about Feliz meeting up with Grandma Blanche. We are sure that Feliz is with Mom/Grandma and Grandma is calling her newest charge, Phyllis.