Saturday, May 2, 2009

My Hero, My Dad


My dear Dad passed away a few weeks ago and I believe I’m ready to write about the funeral and how I feel about him.

Dad’s health has been slowly declining since Mom passed in February 2007. My brothers, sisters and I have been sharing responsibility for caring for him since Mom passed. He’s been living in his home and we’ve taken turns having dinner and visiting with him. One of us has visited with him every day, and those who don’t live nearby have called. Lynette and Chip have been most involved and have visited him countless times daily. I don’t know what we would have done without them, and especially Gog, (Lynette). She’s earned her wings by being an angel here on earth. Thom and Carol have taken care of financial matters, and Carol has stepped into Mom’s shoes when it comes to keeping the family organized and caring for Dad, and each other.

I have the best family. Mom and Dad were excellent examples of hard-working, compassionate, salt-of-the-earth human beings who loved unconditionally and left judgment up to God. They expected nothing less from us.

As the saying goes, no chain is stronger than it’s weakest link. This applies to the Eldon Wright’s in that no family is stronger than it’s weakest member. That would be me. But because of the way we were raised, no one draws any attention to this and I always feel equally cherished when I’m in the sanctuary their love provides.

My contribution to Dad’s care was going to Heber on most Friday’s and spending the night. Dad appreciated me bringing dinner and watching TV with him. My trip to Heber on 4/3 would turn out to be the last I’d spend with Dad. Over time, Dad would have good days and bad days. It was a good day when he remembered my name, and asked about Les and Amie. A not-so-good day was when he’d remember I was his daughter and would ask about my husband and my daughter. A bad day was when he mistook me for a home health aide, and was surprised that I’d be spending the night. It didn’t matter to me what kind of day Dad was having, because my greater memories of him sustain me and I knew he was waiting with patience to join the love of his life, in heaven, my Mom.

I want to share an experience my sister, Kaye will remember. It illuminates the relationship I had with Dad and helps explain what was so special.

I grew up in the middle of a large Mormon family with busy parents and siblings. Dad was the Guidance Counselor at Wasatch High School and Mom worked at the Homestead. We lived on a small farm and had a relatively simple life, which, in retrospect, seemed down right Norman Rockwell. Dad’s work hours were similar to the school hours for his children and his summer break, although not as long as that of us kids, corresponded. Summers were filled with long days, hard work and fun play. We didn’t watch much TV. When Dad caught us sitting in front of the tube, he could certainly find something better for us to do. We learned to find something better to do ourselves, and there was a lot of creative play.

The growing season is short in Wasatch County so summer farm work began a little before the end of the school year and extended until the third crop (of hay) was in the barn, which usually happened by the end of September. There were 10 acres on the property where our home was, about 10 acres east of the Midway Fish Hatchery and way too many leased acres in Charleston and Daniels. We had horses, cows, sheep, pigs (on occasion) and chickens. When we misbehaved, we were sent directly to the garden to pick weeds. (Even now, gardening feels a bit like punishment.)

I loved horses and rode every chance I had, and so did Dad and Kaye. When we were in the middle of hay season, we worked hard from sunrise until sunset. The work was broken up by riding our horses between the fields and barn. Once the hay was loaded on the truck and wagon we’d get on our horses for a ride to the barn. Then we’d stack the hay in the barn, and repeat the process. We usually got 3 loads in each day, sometimes more, and that doesn’t seem like much, but you must know that by the time I was really helpful, Dad’s “haying crew” had become his 4 youngest children, all girls. Anyway, there was often a week or two during the summer when work lightened up and Dad would take Kaye and me for a pleasure ride in the mountains west of home. I always looked forward to it.

The ride I’m about to describe began just as many other. We did chores and made lunches just as dawn was breaking so we’d have the entire day to ride. Dad saddled the horses and we headed toward Snake Creek before sunrise. Dad was riding Trigger, Kaye was on Lightening and I was on Irvine, if my memory serves me. Dad loved sure-footed mountain horses and we had Quarter Horse and Arabian cross breeds. They were smaller than Quarter Horses but their stamina was unexcelled.

The plan was to go up Faucet Canyon, which veered off of the beaten path from a gravel road in a cabin development called Swiss Alpine, north and west of Midway. Dad had traversed the Deer Creek and Snake Creek area since he was a boy and knew all the trails and shortcuts. It had been awhile since his last trip up Faucet Canyon and the over brush was thick, and got thicker and more complicated the farther up the ravine we traveled. When the brush and fallen logs were thick enough Irvine had to jump, rather that step over them, I became unglued and scared and started to cry. (I’m a bawl baby.) I probably got to the point where I refused to continue, but I don’t recall exactly. (Keep in mind, Kaye, my younger sister, was riding a horse as small or smaller than mine, was traveling just as I was, and was not unglued, scared, or bawling.)

When Dad realized something must be done to calm me, we stopped and dismounted. He distracted me by telling me stories of traveling these very trails when he was young. We carved our names in a Quakie (Quaken Aspen), “Dad, Jane and Kaye, 1967” (I think). He admitted that we may have missed the actual trail, but assured me of his faith in these good, solid horses, and in the Lord. He knew I was still anxious so we kneeled down in the shade and he said a prayer. He asked God to promise me that I would know he would not put me in danger, that the horses were fine, even though the climb was tough, and that we would have a good ride and return home unscathed. That prayer did more to put me at ease than anything else, because I knew that my Dad and God were tight. We didn’t go much farther up the trail until we reached the saddle, emerged from the thick brush in the ravine and entered a sagebrush and aspen covered hilltop. (I can smell the warm sage and aspen, and feel the warmth of the sun as I write.) I had been saved.

The rest of the ride was quite uneventful. We dropped over into Little Deer Creek and found a delicious spring where we stopped for lunch and a few more stories. Dad cleared the watercress from the place the water bubble through the ground and showed us how to wait for the water to clear away the mud before drinking. There was nothing better to sooth my thirst.

I learned several lessons that day. I learned how Dad’s faith in the Lord was big enough to settle a nervous horse, and calm my soul. I learned that animals sense my emotions and act accordingly. I learned that if you get lost, improvise. I learned that God watches over good men, little kids and horses when he’s asked by an honorable and deserving man.

Dad and Kaye had a special bond, they were both tuned into the heartstrings of animals. In today’s world they’d be thought of as “horse whisperers.” Back then, they had more than good horse sense. I stopped being afraid, and there were many, many other good rides after that.
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Dad passed away in the early morning hours on Saturday, 4/11/09. Carol called me on Thursday 4/9 to tell me Dad hadn’t been doing well and I should come home. Kaye had come from Vernal to visit Dad the previous weekend and it was the first time she’d been in for quite awhile. She said that they had had a good visit and he seemed to be doing well when she left. I firmly believe that he needed to see Kaye, and know she was okay.

Carol told me Dad had gone to sleep Tuesday night and hadn’t really been awake since. They got a hospital bed and moved him from his bedroom to the living room where he could look out at the beautiful day, should he awaken. By Friday night, it was obvious the end was nearing and all his children were home and at his bedside. Barb, my youngest sister, and Peg, were with Dad when he passed. They both spoke of the peaceful feeling they had, and how thin the veil had become between this world and the next. Mom was waiting for him, as were his parents, my grandparents, and a host of our ancestors who were happy to see him, reunite with him and meet him again.

Peggy, my oldest sister, is a spiritual woman and lives close to the Lord. She’s the one we turn to for stories about our ancestors, as she’s studied and researched our family history. She’s also a very eloquent writer and in anticipation of Dad’s passing, decided she had better begin jotting down an obituary. She told me that twice she sat down to write, and both times she felt impressed that I should compile Dad’s “life sketch,” or obituary. Knowing that she’s attuned to the promptings of the spirit, I couldn’t deny her message. That’s how I came to be the one who condensed the life of a great man into a few short paragraphs that don’t come close to doing justice to the honor he earned.
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Eldon D Wright was born May 2, 1923 to David E and Nellie W Wright, in Charleston, Utah, and passed peacefully from this earth on April 11, 2009, at 2:19 a.m. He was at his home, being watched over by his loved ones on both sides of the veil. His beloved wife, Blanche Thomas Wright has been waiting in heaven for her sweetheart since 2/19/2007, and he had been looking forward to their reunion since she passed. They married on December 18, 1941 in the Salt Lake City Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints Temple. He leaves behind his sister and her husband, ten children and their spouses, 50 grand children, 84 great grand children and one great great grand child. He was preceded in death by his parents, and a great-grand child, Clinton Youngreen. He is survived by his dear sister, Fern (David P) Young of Heber, and by his children, Margaret Ann (Peggy) (David R) Huntington of Pepperell, Massachusetts, Thomas E (Mandy) Wright of Heber, Carol (Rodney) Wade of Lake Creek, Joyce Becker of Heber, David (Ganien) Wright of Daniels, James B (Chip) (Brenda) Wright of Midway, Jane (Les) Broadhead of Salt Lake City and Opal, Wyoming, Kaye (Troy) Gregory of Vernal, Lynette (Kelly) Christensen of Midway, and Barbara Dawn (Michael) Valencia of Middleton, Idaho.

Eldon loved and obeyed his Father in Heaven, loved the earth, his community and young people. He was content serving his fellowman, caring for his family, riding horses, raising beef and tilling the ground.

He was a sailor during World War II and was on the USS Honolulu, a light cruiser, during the Battle of Leyte Gulf. He kept in touch with a few dear shipmates throughout his life.

Eldon was a teacher and a coach, and influenced the lives of many young people, first in Roosevelt, then, for the rest of his 30 year career, with the Wasatch County School District in Heber. He coached football, basketball and wrestling, taught physiology and was the Guidance Counselor at Wasatch High School.

His service to the Lord and his fellowman included being the Bishop of the Charleston Ward, LDS Church, from 1957 to 1970. He was also on the High Council of the Wasatch Stake. He served two missions with his dear companion, Blanche. One in Nauvoo, Illinois at the LDS Visitor’s Center, from January 1988 to January 1989, and one in the Columbia, South Carolina Mission from May 1993 to May 1994. He had many other Church callings and willingly accepted them all. His every thought and action were in keeping with the intent of the Lord. He knew and loved Jesus as his brother. He loved everyone unconditionally and without judgment.

The viewing was Wednesday evening and the funeral services were held on Thursday, 4/16/2009 in the Midway Stake Center, 165 N. Center St., Midway. His internment at the Heber Cemetery, with military honors, followed the services.

Sunday, January 4, 2009

Quacking All the Way

Amie encouraged me to share another bicycling story and she's right. This one is great.

It started innocently enough right after my birthday in October. Amie and Zack gave me all things duck, including a cute little rubber ducky key chain. When you press a button on the side, it quacks. If you hold the button, the cute little quack turns into what sounds like a very agitated Donald Duck when the nephews got the best of him. Anyway, I've recently acquired a portable music device and listen to classic rock on my headphones while riding to work. You'll understand the importance of this little detail, later.

I have panniers on my bicycle, which are loaded with misc. junk every day for my fabulous ride. Since I just had to show my birthday gifts to my friends at work, the key chain was in my panniers. I donned my portable music devise, headphones and helmet, and was on my way.

I pass the same set of bicycle commuters almost daily, as well as the occasional pedestrian. The parkway trail is peppered with assorted wildlife, including various waterfowl. This particular morning, I passed a group of ducks swimming in a spot on a river bend and heard their quacking, a common occurrence.

As I peddled along, passing the folks I always pass and greeting them with the usual "good morning," many of them responded with a quizzical look and a half smile, half chuckle. By the time I left the parkway and began the last third of my ride on the surface streets, I wondered about their responses for a few minutes, then forgot about it. I heard ducks several times during this portion of the ride and it peaked my curiosity, but not enough to give it my full attention.

When I arrived at the parking garage, I had to take my helmet and headphones off, so I could get to my ID badge. The volume was quite high. I swear, it gets louder as I ride. Just then I realized why the quizzical looks and half chuckles from my fellow commuters. Somehow, my rubber ducky key chain had bounced around during the course of the ride and had gotten stuck on quack! Yes, you read right. I had traveled the better part of 35 minutes, quacking all the way!

I hope your 2008 was excellent, or at least, bearable. Have a fine 2009!

Sunday, December 14, 2008

The Epitome of Stupidity!

I’ve stooped to a new level! low! I am the epitome of stupidity! I’ve been so bold as to tell Les, (my well-meaning but somewhat overbearing husband, who lives in a state bordering the one where I live), the reason I like it when he’s gone. It’s because I can sit around a clean house and watch whatever I want on TV. Well, he’s in Wyoming watching a scary movie and insisting I watch it with him here in Salt Lake! And I’m doing it!

Now, you must have some background. I’m the most chicken shit person on the planet when it comes to watching scary movies. I deal with the occasional required scary movie in several ways. I tolerate them, hide my eyes and pretend to be watching them, watch them with one eye closed through fingers clamped over my eyes, avoid them altogether, and wish away even the trailers about them. And Les watches every horror movie ever produced, several times.

To his credit, he tries to be good-humored about his coercion. Since he can’t really insist I watch the movie he’s watching, while we’re located in separate states, he’s created a new category of “sluggo” for the occasion. It’s “chicken shit sluggo,” similar to the standard game, but vastly more humiliating for the chicken. I just learned a reenactment of the movie’s climactic scene is in my future. I can’t wait until he gets home.

Speaking of chickens, I must relate this year’s deer hunting story. (Don’t mistake this for revenge. He’ll get what’s coming to him later.)

Les was returning from his hunting trip and the weather turned bad. It was nearly dusk when he saw a worthy buck and went after him. He drove his 4-wheeler down into a ravine tracking the deer. Big fluffy flakes of snow were falling and the headlight bounced odd images and reflections off the trees and hillside.

Just as he was getting off the machine, he was hit from behind by something that startled him so badly he, (in his own words), “screamed like a girl.” Upon gathering his faculties, and assessing the situation, he discovered he had been ambushed by three Sandhill Cranes! (I’m not kidding.) Two off the near 5 foot tall birds had landed in the nearby clearing, while the ring-leader proceeded to register his (or her) dissatisfaction by doing a hopping, pecking, dance-like thing right in Les’ face.

The initial blow was between the shoulder blades and Les countered with a right cross, which the cagey bird dodged. Feeling like he’d been sucker-punched by a ghost, he immediately prepared for fight or flight and since he lacked flying equipment, he was ready to punch it out with Big Bird’s little brother. I’m not sure of the length of the encounter but I was near rolling on the floor and holding my sides while Les was breathlessly relaying the incident via cell phone. His climactic statement, just before giving up on me ever taking this insult seriously, was, “Do you know how hard you have to kick a bird to make it leave you alone? I kicked that sucker harder than I’ve ever kicked a huntin’ dog.”

I guess the point of this rambling story, is that everyone is a chicken in front of something.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Humans are Dog's Best Friends

Our little Chihuahua Feliz, died today. She was almost 15, which is roughly, 105 in "dog years." My heart's broken. It's been nearly 15 years since I slept without her snoring next to me. I'm having trouble sleeping.

I've been a dog person all my life and usually had bird-hunting dogs. Feliz was my first little dog. When Les began talking to Amie, (my husband to our daughter) about a Chihuahua as a possible birthday gift, my initial response was "I don't want a dog that looks like a rat!" (Sorry Fe.) Amie was around 12 at the time. Les reasoned that it would be good for her to have her own dog to care for and it could be company for her after school. (We already had 2 German Short Haired Pointers.) I agreed to being okay with them beginning a search.

They didn't exercise much restraint on their first excursion to "look at a litter," and upon their return, I was introduced to the cutest, littlest, most lovable little creature I'd ever laid eyes on! Amie and Les shared mutually in her purchase and thus, were able to claim her as their own. She, on the other hand, claimed me as her "person" immediately, and that's the relationship in which I've stayed for all these years.

In the Chihuahua version of Sir Edmond Hillary planting the first flag on the top of Mount Everest, on Feliz's first night as a member of our family, she carried out an amazing feat of acquisition. She snuggled into my bathrobe and kept snuggling until she emerged out of my left sleeve. Had she had opposable thumbs, she may well have planted a victory flag on my left hand.

There are hundreds and hundreds of wonderful memories. I'll share some of them later. (For the benefit of my porous memory, don't forget to share the epic fishing trip on the Green River just below Fontanelle Dam. Her first swim, fear of fish, an owl looking for lunch, an Osprey catching the first fish, a fox or coyote getting the Dutch Oven Pineapple Upside-down Cake and Feliz behaving as an actual dog.) (Remember to relate "Attack of the Tourist" in Jackson Hole, too.)

At any rate, Feliz hadn't been feeling well for a couple of weeks. Her breathing was labored and very difficult. She was very distressed last Wednesday night and didn't settle down to sleep at all. On Thursday night she kept Les from concentrating on late-night television with similar behavior. At around 1:00 a.m. I took her to the Veterinarian ER because she was so distressed. The Vet took x-rays of her heart, put her in an oxygen container and gave her a bunch of medications. We expected her to stay there for several days and then come home healthy.

The Vet on duty Friday afternoon did an ultrasound because her improvement was minimal. The ultrasound revealed she had cancer in her lungs and liver. Euthanasia was their suggestion, describing it as the humane choice. We weren't ready.

We brought her home Saturday night to keep her comfy and to get ready for her death. Les went to Wyoming, and I spent the day trying to pretend she was okay.

Amie and Zack came over in the afternoon to comfort her, and me. After Feliz listened to about an hour of tears and reminiscing, she laid her little head on Amie's shoulder and quit breathing. It happened so peacefully and now she's gone.

Feliz, Thank you for the enormous amount of sunshine you brought into my life. And in such a small bundle! Thank you for making me believe my arrival always made your day. You were the only creature on the planet that was happy to see me every time I came through the door. With you went a piece of my heart. Right now it feels like a giant hole, but I'm patching it up with happy memories of you. I love you, Your biggest fan, Mom

One side-bar: All dogs go to heaven. My Mom passed away over a year ago and she's in heaven doing whatever angels do. She loved Feliz, but never got her name right. She called her Phyllis. Amie, Zack and I laughed out loud talking about Feliz meeting up with Grandma Blanche. We are sure that Feliz is with Mom/Grandma and Grandma is calling her newest charge, Phyllis.

Saturday, August 2, 2008

Jordan River Parkway Ride-8/1/2008

I ride my bicycle to work and back on the Jordan River Parkway. The Parkway trail winds along the Jordan River through the Salt Lake Valley. It is a beautiful stretch of green space through the center of this urban, very desert valley. Its 8 miles to work and all but two of them are on the trail. I observe the seasons changing first-hand on my daily route.

Yesterday began as a typical ride. Although daylight is delayed a little bit each day, it is still very light when I leave home at 6:45. I don my sunglasses about half way to work these days, and soon, I won't need them until the trip home.

About two miles into the ride, I heard the sound of a large startled animal. A familiar sound you often hear hiking in the mountains. The sound of an agile creature jumping from a resting position to four alert feet, then the thump, thump, thump of it bounding a few steps, then the silence when the animal freezes to pay attention what startled him in the first place.
Right in the middle of the asphalt trail in front of me was a four-point buck looking right at me! He was beautiful. His antlers weren’t wide, but very high, probably 6 to 8 inches above the top of his ears. They were covered in velvet, which he hadn’t begun shredding, yet. His coat was the tawny tan that gave rise to the term buckskin, and he appeared well-fed and healthy. He wasn’t about to stick around long enough for me to figure out how to use the camera on my cell phone. He was with a doe. She stayed in the thick brush near the river’s edge. The exchange took only seconds, but seeing the pair restored my faith in the healing power of nature. I’ve been renewed.